( open ) back to life

[jackson alexander evans]

Jackson wasn’t normally one to go out on the town, but after seeing the commercial for this particular movie he just had to make an exception for opening weekend. It may not have seemed like a big deal to anyone else, going to a movie, but for Jackson this was a huge event. Most of his time was spent either working or at home, alone, drinking and watching television. While he still had a flask in hidden in the pocket of his flannel button up shirt, he had taken the first step and left the apartment for the evening. He was feeling quite proud of himself.

But he was also feeling a bit self-conscious. It seemed like everyone waiting in line had someone with them--friend, date, family member. As he examined the people around him he noticed that he was the only one going stag. Reaching into his pocket he took out the flask and took a swig, receiving a odd look from someone nearby to which he gave a roguish grin. "Medicine," he told them. They just looked away leaving him amused.

When he arrived at the counter he reached into his wallet to pull out cash. “One please,” he told the woman. If he hadn’t already been feeling out of place before then he certainly would have been with the look she gave him when he mentioned he was alone . The girl also seemed confused by the concept of handling cash. When she ended up short-changing him he just let it go, not wanting to mess with it.

He entered the lobby and the smell of buttery popcorn filled his nostrils. He hadn’t had dinner yet and the smell was appetizing enough to make his mouth water. Already he knew he didn’t have enough in the bank, but he hoped that he had enough leftover in his wallet. Jackson groaned slightly after he counted and realized he was a couple dollars short and he’d have to do without. “Well that’s my luck,” he chuckled to himself.

[alexandra noelle kingsley]

it had been twelve days since lexy had arrived back to miami. just twelve days since she left boston, and lexy was already feeling out of sorts, though she had been gone from miami for merely three months before and had never quite felt comfortable in her hometown of boston. and yet, it had been twelve days here, and she had yet to see jackson. if it weren't for him, she would have stayed in boston, gone through with the fake engagement to jackson's best friend, and erected her restaurant there. as uneasy as lexy was in boston, she hated miami more. the overly peppy feeling that came with the beach atmosphere was certainly too much for her to handle most of the time.

though she knew he was hurt from having been up and left by his fiancé, lexy had expected that jackson would be around town somewhere. however, after twelve days of spending every ounce of time that wasn't based around a planning meeting for the opening of her restaurant doing mindless acts out in the open on the off chance that jackson walked by, lexy had yet to see him. she really did not want to stop by his house. she wanted their first meeting in months to be in a neutral location where they couldn't fight too loudly for fear of causing a scene.

since she had yet to find him, lexy had decided to take a personal day before reluctantly heading to his place. she had planned on watching a movie at the apartment she was currently leasing - she certainly wouldn't call it home - but the power had unexpectedly gone out. she imagined the next-door-neighbor was probably using her blow dryer, straightener, curling iron, tv, and every light in the apartment at the same time once again. it had happened several times in the twelve days since lexy had first leased the apartment.

in light of her loss of power, lexy had instead decided to throw a bra on under her t-shirt, put her hair in a ponytail, and head down to the movie theater. she was never one for sappy love stories, and she didn't particularly like gory movies, either. so she walked up to the ticket counter and asked for a ticket to the r-rated katherine heigl rom-com that was currently playing. katherine heigl was probably lexy's favorite actress, though the high-class scholar was unlikely to tell anyone that she even had a favorite actress. in fact, she had decided to wear her giant sunglasses until she got into the dark theater so no one would recognize her.

however, as lexy stepped through the door to the lobby of the theater, she knew all her plans had gone to smoke. her jaw dropped and she froze because there, right in front of her eyes, was the love of her life, jackson evans.

[jackson alexander evans]

As he slid the wallet back in his pants pocket he gave a nod at a couple girls walking by. “How ya doin’, ladies?” he asked in deep baritone that made even himself cringe afterward. He never was very suave. Lifting his hand to the back of his head, he ran his fingers through his hair sheepishly. Despite his embarrassment they seemed amused by it as they walked on and that was the least he could have asked for even if it was at his own expense. Taking out his flask again he took another drink. That would have to satiate him instead of popcorn, but he was fairly certain he’d be contented with it.

His eyes moved to the long line of people waiting to have their tickets torn. Glancing up at the screen above the ticket taker he saw the words ‘remain in lobby’ flashing beside the name of the particular movie he’d come to see indicating that the previous showing hadn’t let out yet. With a sigh he walked over to a cushioned seat underneath a set of posters and sat down.

Jackson stretched his legs out leisurely and leaned back against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. With nothing better to do he just scanned the area finding that watching the people go about their lives was actually rather entertaining. Then again he’d been in the house for so long that he probably would have found anything interesting. After a moment he started making silly faces to pass the time, checking the board every so often until he could actually go into the theater and pick a seat.

There wasn’t much left in his flask and the movie hadn’t even started yet. Jackson frowned as he shook the remaining contents to judge how much was left. Upon closer examination of the flask, he noticed something in the peripheral of his vision. Someone, to be exact. Someone he thought he wouldn’t have ever seen again. But she couldn’t be real, could she? Jackson’s eyes moved back to the alcohol in his hand. “Well that’s a first,” he muttered in awe to himself, fully believing that he was having hallucinations while intoxicated. Not a very good one either as it brought back painful memories. He slid the container back in his pocket calling it quits for the night.

The words on the board changed from ‘remain in lobby’ to ‘now seating’ overhead. Placing his hands on his knees Jackson stood up with a loud groan. His joints felt stiff from having sat after working a long day; he felt like an old man.

Jackson walked over to the long time, pausing slightly when he passed the familiar woman. He leaned back slightly, clearly examining her, before shaking his head and walking on. He had to just be seeing things.

[alexandra noelle kingsley]

after days of looking for him, she would find jackson here? he'd never been one to go out at all, much less attend a movie outside his house. but here he was, clear as day, sitting on a cushioned bench against the wall, shaking a...a flask?

lexy's mother had been an alcoholic. she had drank herself to her death bed when lexy, the oldest of the ten kingsley children, and the only sane one in her own mind, was only sixteen. her father had banned alcohol in the house after that moment, though lexy often smelled scotch or brandy on the man's breath when he emerged from his study. lexy, however, had stuck firmly to the idea that no amount of alcohol is a good amount of alcohol and she had mostly kept jackson's drinking at bay when they were together. she had come to believe he was not a heavy drinker anyway, but taking a flask to the movies was certainly the marks of a heavy drinker. if he wasn't one before, he had become one in the three months since she had been gone.

but old habits die hard, and as lexy watched her ex-fiance make his way into the theater that was now flashing a now seating sign, she stomped in after him, not caring that this theater was not the one for which she had purchased a ticket. she did not know what she was going to say to him. she had rehearsed her take-me-back speech a thousand times, but all of her thoughts had left her mind when she saw that flask in his hand. she had to keep him from this self-destructive behavior. first and foremost she had to keep him safe. she knew that was the true sign of love. she loved him because she would rather he be safe than take her back. she would protect him in any way she knew how. it was the only way she knew to show him how much she loved him.

it took a moment for lexy's eyes to adjust to the sudden dark, and it took her a moment longer to realize that this was due in part to the large sunglasses that covered her face. she pulled them off and placed them lightly on the top of her head, storming into the theater to find jackson, as she had lost sight of him. she stared up into the rows and rows of seats until she saw him. she took a deep breath and walked toward him. with confidant, well-posed steps, she closed the distance until she was standing in front of the man she had loved and would love forever.

some people were quite confused when they were introduced to lexy and jackson as a couple. before lexy and jackson's friend had come up with the idea of opening king's fine dining, lexy had been a chef at another four star restaurant in miami. she had an mba and had just passed the bar exam from law school when she got engaged to jackson. by contrast, jackson was a landscaper. he refused to accept a penny from lexy's old-money family, and she had agreed with him up until she had gone begging for her trust fund to open her business. but jackson was an extraordinary man. you had to peel back the layers to see it, but he knew how to treat a woman, and he had big dreams for their future family. they had talked about kids - lexy wanted three, but she would be willing to settle for anything when it came to jackson. she knew she had put all of her dreams with him on the line when she had left for boston, but she had a dream of a restaurant, and that had been all that was at the forefront of her mind.

now, lexy stood over jackson, and the words escaped her. she had no clue what to say. not even an "i'm sorry" would escape her lips. so she sat down next to him, and, in a totally uncharacteristically-lexy move, reached over and took the final swig of the alcohol from his flask. as it moved its way down her throat, it stung of pain and regret, and for the first time in a really long time, lexy broke down crying in public.

ooc: to be clear, i had a totally different ending in mind for that post, but it just came out like that, and i think it's kinda brilliant.[/size]

[jackson alexander evans]

Since Jackson was one of the first in the theater he was able to get his favorite seat--a few rows back right in the center. He sat down and lowered the arm rests on either side of him. The seats were a lot more comfortable than he remembered the last time he was at the movies. These were bigger, wider, and they even rocked which immediately took to doing. His eyes were focused on the screen at all the ads for the concession stand that he hadn’t been able to get anything from. Of course now they’d flash the pictures of food across the large screen.

The room began to fill, but it wasn’t completely full yet. There were still a few empty seats left including one beside him. He wasn’t paying much attention as someone approached him, figuring it was just another stranger looking for a seat. All that changed though when the person who’d sat down reached over and took his flask.

“What the-” he busted out angrily, turning in his chair to see the culprit. The words caught in his throat when he saw her face though. “Damn,” he whispered quietly. The woman he’d seen in the lobby had been real. It’d actually been her. Alexandra. Or Lexy, as everyone called her. The love of his life. His fiancé. The woman who’d left him and made his life miserable by doing so.

She was making it incredibly difficult to be angry at her. While he’d wanted to let her know how much she’d hurt him by using a lot of expletive terms, he couldn’t really do that now that she was sobbing beside him. Everyone in the theater began looking in their direction, looking at him as if he’d done something wrong to her. The lights were dimming for the movie to start and people were shushing in their direction.

Jackson pocketed his flask before standing up. Leaning over to place a comforting hand on her shoulder he whispered in her ear, "Come on. Lets talk out in the hallway.”

(OOC: It's all good. I just go with the flow. (:)

[alexandra noelle kingsley]

suffice it to say, lexy was not a huge fan of public displays of emotion. before she had met jackson, she hadn't enjoyed public displays of affection either, but she had grown to look on couples who began going at each other in very public places as people whose love simply knew no boundaries. however, emotion was a different thing. it was quite easy to be strong enough to hold it together - at least until you made it to the bathroom where no one could see your mascara falling down your face in droves. yet, that was exactly what lexy's was doing at this exact moment as the blue tears mixed with the jet black liquid eyeliner she always wore. she hated herself for letting her emotions get to her this way, but that just made her cry harder.

anyone would tell you that lexy was a leader. she didn't allow others to take charge. she led the way no matter where she was going. she didn't follow other people as they dragged her places. but this was quickly becoming a day in which lexy didn't know herself. so, rather than staying put and dealing with her own emotions as a kick in the face to the person who had suggested she do something rather than letting her determine her own fate, lexy followed jackson out of the theater. the touch of his hand to his shoulder sent shivers down her spine, and she could simply not react in any other way but to do exactly as he told her to. he had always had this power over her, and she could not understand it. no one had ever been able to make her do the things jackson convinced her to do.

when they reached the lobby, lexy collapsed onto a bench, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. she had come here to beg forgiveness, and here jackson was, comforting her, when she knew that all he really wanted to do was curse her out and leave her lying in a puddle on the floor. but he really was just too much of an amazing guy.

finally finding her voice, lexy managed to squeak out a few words between heavy sobs. she knew they weren't the right ones, but she could find nothing better. "i...miss...you..." she managed to blubber, knowing even as she said it that it would send off pain signals through jackson's whole body and wishing she could take it back.

ooc: should we make a request for the best friend?[/size]

[jackson alexander evans]

Jackson led Lexy with his hand on the small of her back to the lobby. Before they left the theater he took one last look back behind him at the screen knowing that his eight dollars had just gone to waste. But he wasn’t going to leave her there crying no matter what he felt towards her. Or maybe that was exactly the reason why he couldn’t leave her there.

When they reached the lobby and she sat down, he stood in front of her not really knowing what to do. Although a part of him wanted to comfort her, he had to tell himself that it wasn’t his job to do that anymore--even if it was incredibly hard for him to stand there without really doing anything. He wasn’t sure what was appropriate and what wasn’t in this situation. To keep himself from pulling her into a hug, Jackson crossed his arms and looked down at his shoes.

“You okay?” he asked. Immediately afterward he felt as if it was a stupid question. Of course she wasn’t okay. If she was okay then she wouldn’t have taken the rest of his alcohol and burst out crying. Lexy taking his flask and drinking it herself was a big red flag in his mind. He knew how she felt about that. Something must have been very wrong.

When she started to speak, Jackson leaned forward in order to hear her. It was hard to make out what she was saying and when the phrase had made it out of her mouth he wished that he hadn’t heard it. Leaning back, he lifted his hands to his face and ran his fingers over his chin thoughtfully. “You…miss me…” he repeated, trying to comprehend what was going on. He couldn’t.

Shaking his head, Jackson rested his hand on his chin and bit down on his tongue until the metallic taste of blood filled his mouth. “You miss me?” he said again. “You go away, leave me for my best friend, I haven’t heard from you in months, and now you have the nerve to come back and say that you miss me?” He continued to shake his head as if somehow that would help him understand what was going on. He’d heard nothing from her. If she missed him wouldn’t she have called or something? He looked back at her, watching her cry. He hated seeing her cry. As much as he wanted to scold her for what she‘d done to him, he couldn‘t while she was so upset.

Taking a seat down beside her, Jackson wrapped his arms around her shoulder and pulled her close into him. “Damn it, Lexy,” he sighed. “I can’t even be mad at you right now.”

(ooc: we could do that. add more dramaz)

[alexandra noelle kingsley]

waiting for his response, lexy folded her hands in her lap and tried to blink away the tears. she had to stop this. this was so unlike her. she didn't just burst out in emotion - especially in public. in the five years they had been together, lexy could only remember a handful of times she had cried in front of jackson. if lexy was going to cry, she chose to put on big sunglasses and drive to an abandoned field where she could let it all out without anyone being the wiser. crying in front of people, well, it was embarrassing, and it was not a thing that proper ladies like lexy were prone to do. so doing so, here, in the middle of the movie theater, was probably one of the most embarrassing things lexy had ever had to sit through.

as jackson started to go off on her, lexy swallowed, hard. the tears stopped running and though she knew her face was a wreck from the make-up that had smeared its way down her cheeks, she actually had to bite back a smile. because it was the first time in three months that she was getting to hear his voice. it was stressed and throaty and absolutely beautiful. though he was furious with her, she could still hear in it the tones of love that she would bring back. this couldn't be the end of them. they were too right for each other, even as different as they were. they'd find a way to fall in love again. they'd pick right back up where they left on. they had to.

she was expecting him to continue ranting. to hit something, maybe. but then he did something completely unexpected. he told her he couldn't be mad at her. he sat down next to her and wrapped his arm around her. she leaned into him, taking in his scent, which now had a tinge of the smell of alcohol to it though she was in no position to be mad at him.

it fascinated lexy, really. she had never been one to owe anything to anyone. it was always other people that were forced to do her bidding. there had never really been a time when she had done something so bad that she owed someone for her wrongdoings. but here she was, in that exact predicament. she knew that if jackson was willing to take her back she'd have to be the best girlfriend, fiancee, wife that she could be. and she was absolutely up for the challenge if the man currently sitting beside her would forgive her for all the pain she knew she had inflicted on him. and she knew what the pain felt like because she had felt it acutely for every moment that she had been away from him. she loved him more than she had loved anyone in her entire life, and she wasn't shying away from that love.

"i'm really sorry, jackson," she began. she sat up, looking him in the eyes, determined to make this right. "i was stupid for leaving. i know that there is no one, nothing, that's better than you. the love we have - well, it's perfect to say the least. i don't know what i was looking for. i guess i was wondering if i was missing something. but i should have known better. because, when i'm with you, there's nothing better. there's nothing in the world that could possibly be better." she had thought it impossible, but there were more tears coming now. silent ones, this time. they were just simple blue droplets sliding from her eyes as she poured her heart out to jackson. "please," she whispered, although she wasn't quite sure what she was asking for.

[jackson alexander evans]

Taking his hand he lifted it to her cheek, wiping away the mascara that was running down the sides of her face with his thumb. He knew Lexy and he knew that she must have been feeling pretty horrible in order to break down and cry like that in front of him. It wasn’t the first time he saw her cry, but from what he remembered she didn’t do it often. As he brushed away the make-up he had to bite down on his tongue to keep from saying something he’d have normally said. Something along the lines of ‘you’re beautiful’ or ‘perfect’. The woman could have been a complete mess covered in dirt and dressed in rags and he’d have thought she was flawless.

But that didn’t change anything. It didn’t change that she’d left. Lexy could apologize, but none of it gave him back any of the time he’d lost--the time he’d lost with her or the time he’d lost by trying to drink away his pain.

“I think I made it worse,” Jackson winced. He’d gotten distracted staring at her that he hadn’t even realized that he was doing more to smear the mascara than he was doing to remove it. Giving her a sheepish look he sighed. “Sorry about that,” he told her gruffly before he pulled his hands back. She seemed to have calmed down now and was doing better so that was good.

When she started to apologize he closed his eyes. “Don’t-” he tried to say, not wanting to talk about it or bring it up, but Lexy was already speaking. What was he supposed to say to this? He’d spent these past few months trying to forget about her and move on. Why was it now, when he finally started to get a grip on things again, did she have to come back? Resting his hands on his knees he leaned forward, hanging his head towards the ground.

“You’re right about one thing,” he told her. “You should have known better.” Jackson felt like an ass for saying it, but it was how he felt. Standing up from the bench he shrugged his shoulders at her. “I don’t know what you’re asking me for, Lexy,” he told her. “Are you asking me to take you back? God knows I still love you, Lexy, but damn. I don’t know if I can do that. Not after everything.”

[alexandra noelle kingsley]

as he wiped the mascara from beneath her eyes, lexy truly had to fight the urge to kiss him. she knew as much as she was yearning for it, as much as she had dreamed of it every day since she had been gone, it would only make matters worse. there was no way that it could help. it would just make them both jittery and unbearable. it was the exact kind of thing that needed to be avoided. lexy knew exactly what would happen when she kissed him. it was why, when they were together, she couldn't kiss him as he was walking out the door for work in the morning. they were too in love. one kiss would lead to another, and then they'd barely be able to get into the door of his - she shuddered, feeling weird about not using the pronoun their - house before they started pulling at one another's clothing. it was just better not to start.

but all that ended when she started apologizing. and then... well, she didn't really know what she had been expecting. that jackson would welcome her back with open arms? she certainly couldn't have thought that. he loved her to the ends of the earth, and she knew that. but she also knew that she had hurt him the way no one else ever had, and that was practically unforgivable. the retribution she would have to make in order for him to accept her back into his life was incomparable. but she had to try.

taking a deep breath, lexy looked up at him through her eyelashes. "i don't expect you to just take me back," she said evenly. "what i did was unforgivable. but i do expect you to take me home. let me cook you dinner. i can tell you what i've done the last three months if you want, or we can talk about what you need me to do to forgive you. i made a mistake, jackson. and i need a chance to make up for that mistake." of course, if he did ask what she had done in the last three months, she would just have to pile more lies on top of the ones she had already told. it wasn't like she could just tell him she'd been lying to him for three months. it was already long past time for her to fess up, but she just couldn't do it. she'd have to make up a life with his best friend on the spot. but she'd do it if it meant getting jackson back.